My Favorite Sin
by BoandNora-ItsOneWord
Summary: When Nora walks in on her own funeral, a lot of things are different; But the real drama lies in the fact that she doesn't know she and Bo are divorced-and he can't bring himself to tell her. Remake of the story when Nora came back from the dead thinking she and Bo were still together. Will Be Slightlu AU and A Little Bit Controversial.
1. Its Okay Not To Be Okay

**Chapter One: It's Okay To Not Be Okay**

It was as if she had stepped out of her own skin...unsteady on the ground she stood on...the barriers of safety now stripped away. She felt an almost uncanny need to just slip further away...to embrace her unbalanced psyche. _Was it possible to truly lose touch with reality when you hadn't even known you were missing anything?_ She was looking out into the concerned faces of the people she was supposed to know...and not all of them, she recognized. It was then when she realized that she had walked in on her own funeral...

" _Nora_ ," she heard someone call out, except she was so focused on what she was witnessing that she couldn't tell who had said it. Her heart seemed to crash violently against her ribcage and she was gasping for air. She needed to breathe...she needed to be anywhere but here.

 _"Nora,"_ the voice called again, and she was running this time. She was running until she couldn't run anymore. It felt like a rubber band had snapped in her brain and she could feel all of her emotions at once...She just wanted the noise to stop...she wanted to be somewhere where it was quiet...where she didn't have so many people looking at her like she was about to break.

"What the hell is happening to me," she wondered aloud? "Why can't I remember?"

She clutched the cold hard pavement as she fell to her knees...waves of hysterical tears now pouring out of her blood shot eyes. She wanted to find relief in the tears but all she could think about was how much she had lost...she was practically shaking when she felt the familiar touch of a hand on her shoulder.

"It's okay...It's okay, I'm not going to hurt you," he said.

She didn't look at him...how could she look at him when she was afraid of what she would see? She knew he wouldn't hurt her...but she was afraid of trusting what she saw. _What if this was all some really bad dream?_

"Bo...Bo, is that...is that really you?"

He reached out his hand and it was then when she blinked back the tears and stared into those soulful eyes...the last eyes she remembered looking into.

"It's me," he said, and she forced a smile as she allowed him to pull her to her feet. She needed some semblance of normalcy. She needed his arms around her.

"I missed you so much," she said, as she crumpled into the only arms she ever remembered wanting to stay in. It felt so good to be safe again. She just wished she could remember how she had ever gotten to be 'unsafe.'

"Are you okay," he asked her? "Are you really okay? It's okay if you're not, you know? We're worried about you. We're all so worried. But you don't have to be okay. Not after what you went trough. Just tell me...tell me what you need?"

He was rambling...he was just like her in that...he rambled when he was nervous. "I need...you," she said, and pressed her lips against his. "I need my husband," she reiterated before he could ask her why she had kissed him. It all made perfect sense now. She believed they were still married. He didn't know how to tell her that they were divorced now.

"Nora...Nora, what's wrong," he asked, when her eyes seemed to drift into nothingness. Her face was deathly white now...her hands cold and clammy...she looked at him just briefly before she collapsed in his arms.

"Nora," he screamed, but he couldn't wake her up. He needed to get her to the hospital quickly. There was no time to wait around for an ambulance. He just prayed they weren't about to lose her all over again.


	2. Torn

**Chapter Two: Torn**

He could still feel the familiar embrace of her limp body as he carried her into the emergency room. Every breath he took was accompanied by the very real sensation that her life was in his hands.

" _I need a doctor in here,_ " he remembered screaming, even if his world seemed to be moving in slow motion. There was a gurney at his side in almost no time at all, and then she was poked and prodded and wheeled away for examination. He was vaguely aware of the fact that Larry was asking him to comment on her mental state.

"I…I don't know Larry," he managed to choke out." I barely spoke to her. She thinks we're still married."

Larry put a comforting hand on his shoulder and told him he was an enormous help. He didn't know what that meant. The only thing he _did_ know was that his ex-wife was in trouble and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it. _Helplessness wasn't his strong suit._

He sunk down into one of the chairs in the waiting room…and for the first time since her 'death' he allowed himself a private moment to let the tears come…though this time they were in relief.

* * *

He wasn't sure when he was aware of the time passing so slowly but when the doors opened and Larry finally stepped out, it felt like he had been waiting his entire life for this moment.

"How is she Larry," he finally asked?

Larry's face seemed to convey all of the emotions swimming around in his own heart. He had been more than Nora's doctor for years, he had also been her friend. If he trusted anyone to know what was best for her, it would be him.

"She doesn't seem to have any brain damage Bo. Her body is weak. My best guess is that the memory loss may be her mind going back to the place she felt the safest."

"But…but why did she collapse Larry? Is she ever going to get her memory back?"

"I can't answer those questions right now. I don't have the answers."

"So what are we supposed to do for her? "

"I would advise _against_ telling her what really happened between you two. I know that goes against everything you believe in but…Bo, I'm afraid of what will happen if she's forced to face reality before her mind is ready to accept it. In all my experience with these cases, it's usually a defense mechanism. "

"What are you saying Larry?"

"I have to run more tests to find out if there is anything physically wrong with her… but for now, I think it would be best if you could just humor her…It won't be forever."

" You think I should ' _play'_ her husband again? How exactly is that going to work?"

Larry took a deep breath as he turned to face Bo, a man who had long been a friend of his. He wasn't asking this so much as her doctor but as her friend. He was honestly worried about her state of mind.

"I know things are strained between you two but you loved her once didn't you? Can't you just focus on _those_ memories for a little while…just until we find out what we are dealing with?"

"What happens if she never remembers anything…and how is she going to react when I tell her that we don't live in the same place?"

"Maybe you could take her back there Bo; Isn't the house sitting empty right now since the last owners didn't fulfill their contract? It would be familiar to her. Maybe it will spark her memories."

"Larry, you know that I respect you and your medical advice immensely… but what you are asking me to do…"

"I know. I know its unorthodox. I wouldn't ask if I had a better way of getting to the truth. Just…think about it okay. You don't have to make any decisions you aren't comfortable with. I have to go check on another patient. I'll see you later. "

After Larry walked away, Bo found himself staring into her hospital room. She was still unconscious. _Could he really do this, he wondered. Could he look into those gorgeous brown eyes and lie to her? And for how long was this charade supposed to continue?_

"Bo."

He was brought out of his thoughts by the voice of his current girlfriend Melanie. He had forgotten all about her. The moment he laid eyes on his ex-wife, she had been his _only_ concern. Right now she still was. _What exactly was he going to tell Melanie? Could he really stand to look at her when there was one overwhelming thought ringing in his head…she wasn't Nora?_


End file.
